Day to day

Spring break is over for me.

It was a wasted week, all nine days gone into the abyss, never to return.  I became sick near the end, too… but then I realized that it was nothing more than an allergy coming earlier than usual.  Am I okay? I do not know. I still feel under the influence of Benadryl, which is to say not much, my car drove like a washing machine and sputtering somehow, as it was morning and more humid and usual and the car was chilly but not cold.  I had my car checked but the mechanic supposedly cannot think of any life-threatening issues about it so I am supposed to drive it for a week more or something like that.  So I drive.  That was Friday.  Am I supposed to hope that the car gets worse?  That is terrible… that is like looking at a cancer patient and wondering if the tumor is big enough and seeing if it will grow.

I worked from Tuesday to Thursday.  That left me with two three-day weekends, which was not really worth anything.  A good part of the first part was wasted, as well, by the online midterm exam that I took and did well but I really did not need to study all that much for it.  How much of a waste of time was that, I wonder?

The days continue to be a series of blurs.  Day in, day out.  I go to class then go to work, and if I am lucky and have time, a nap before work.  I then go to work, more often late than not, just like the classes that I do not quite know why I am taking.  I am staying in school today late because of a class that will begin at 7:15 in the evening, and a terrible fact is that I have no need or use for the class, save for the fact that maybe I can get a degree in CIS and I make a living out of it somehow.

And it will be all done by the end of the April.  What will I do then?

I am afraid of what the future will bring, which will also be all a blur.