Second week and nothing

So far, I appear to have failed.

Before I go any further about what I am talking about, let me elaborate about what I wanted to do once the school was in session.  I wanted to, first of all, do everything right.  I wanted to talk to the instructors, make acquaintances, and generally get off to a good start.

So far, though, it does not seem that I am doing a good job.  First few days were all right:  I woke up generally early enough, read ahead on much of the things that I had to read, and did all my assignments.  In the academic side, it was all right.

Not so much on the social front, though.  I do not think I even tried to strike a conversation with others.  It could be because I just get into the class in time and not early, and I take off right after the class is over—I do not have much questions for the instructors, and I have a job to go to in the morning so I cannot stick around for long.  And the nature of the job—taking customers’ orders and possibly making small talks—basically saps away all of my need for socialization outside it.  In fact, outside work, I can just do things and not say a thing for rest of the day.

It may be all right if I were to simply go about on my day.  But it is not that simple, is it?  I need to make friends; talking to the same people every day does not cut it.  Having a girlfriend—or rather, a long-distance transpacific relationship is not helping, either.  When was the last time I hugged someone?  I want some physical contact, someone that can keep me company, even though I may not say all that much things.  I will talk to strangers if I were inclined to, but all I go are library and work and classes, so it crimps a lot of options, I think.

Or maybe I just think that, and I could talk to anyone I want to.  Who knows.

I was hoping that I will be better off this semester.  I still do, although the hope is fading somewhat.